
Overcoming the Fear of Death with Psychedelics
Dying Is an Art and We Can Practice It There are words that only touch us when we dare to fall still. Like the word
As a young woman, I worked in the corporate world, lived with my partner, and from the outside, life looked perfectly fine. Yet I was constantly dissatisfied. I was functioning, but something did not feel right.
When my relationship ended and I finally faced the fact that I had been struggling with food for years, I could no longer look away.
What I had always seen as strength — “I can take care of myself” — turned out to be a way of protecting myself. Vulnerability felt like failure, so I avoided what I felt. Controlling food helped me keep those feelings at a distance.
Through years of personal work with ayahuasca, systemic work, and in-depth process work, I began to understand where these patterns came from. In that process, more space opened up for my creativity and, eventually, for the work I now do with great dedication.
I trained as a certified ayahuasca facilitator and process therapist at PENVA Proceswerk. I bring over eight years of experience, more than 200 personal plant ceremonies, and have guided over 700 participants.
My approach is rooted in process therapy, bringing together trauma processing, body-oriented work, attachment patterns, and systemic work — supported by years of study and extensive personal experience.
My approache
I work with people who have lost touch with their own needs, boundaries, and feelings. In particular, those who notice that the ways they have adapted, coped, or held themselves together for years no longer fit who they are today.
Through ayahuasca ceremonies and individual in-depth sessions, we explore recurring patterns and the themes you find yourself returning to. The setting offers calm and space — to move beyond what you already understand, and come closer to what you feel.
People often describe my guidance as warm, attentive, and easy to connect with. The work may reach into spiritual territory, but my approach remains grounded and down-to-earth. Depth does not need complexity. I value simplicity, honesty, and genuine human contact.
Music has a natural place in my ceremonies. I sing and play guitar, while silence is given the space it needs. There is depth, but also room for lightness and humour.
My partner Ramses regularly joins the weekends as a musician and co-facilitator.
At the heart of my work is learning to know and trust yourself — so that the choices you make reflect who you are, rather than who you believe you should be.
I live with my partner Ramses in Maarssen. I like life fairly simple: oatmeal in the morning, a swim outdoors, singing, dancing, and days spent messing around with projects at home.
Want to know more about how I work? Listen to my podcast De Cirkel van Het Leven.
Curious whether an ayahuasca ceremony in the Netherlands or individual in-depth work could support you? You are welcome to get in touch.
Carlijn

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